On the initial night of the DNC, I assumed that Michelle would steal the show. After months of conservatives deriding her for finally being proud of America, I thought that she would take the stage, be pretty, not imply that she was embarrassed of her country, and be the toast of Denver until Hill-dawg took the stage the next night. What I failed to account for in my assumption is that our country’s most accomplished murderer would give such a rousing address.

I have always been amazed at the charmed life that the senator from Massachusetts has been afforded simply because of his genealogy; apparently having a brother that was an attractive-yet-terrible president and another that was an attractive-yet-terrible potential president are the only qualifications for a life-long senate seat in that oh so advanced state in the east. All that family tragedy, plus now he has an illness to boot? How can someone not sympathize with the guy?

Oh yeah, because he killed that girl that one time.